Dear Amy and Kyle,<\/p>\n
I hope you had enjoyable holidays. Based on the number of parties you attended and all of the comings and goings I saw and heard about, it seems that you were festive and merry. Good for you.<\/p>\n
Recently I\u2019ve been listening to you banter back and forth about potential New Year\u2019s resolutions for 2012. Lose some weight. Read more. Spend less time watching TV. You know, the kinds of things that all humans consider as worthwhile endeavors at the beginning of every year, only to quit them within a few weeks.<\/p>\n
Well, as you know, I just turned 100 years old in 2011. I thought it might be a good idea to come up with my own resolutions for 2012, seeing as I\u2019m heading into my next century of being and all. I haven\u2019t really had resolutions in the past, but I see this as good of a time as any to start. Since I\u2019m a house and don\u2019t really have income or moveable limbs in order to help myself, you\u2019re going to need to assist me with these items. I figure it\u2019s the least you can do since you live within my walls and keep me busy on a daily basis. In no particular order, here\u2019s what I\u2019d like to work on for 2012:<\/p>\n
1.<\/strong>\tBe less dusty. I know you have a kid and a Labrador, but maybe this can be a mutual goal. Dust me more and you can lose some weight?<\/p>\n 2.<\/strong>\tHave fewer weeds in my garden beds. Again, seems like a mutual goal. You lose more weight, I keep my self respect with the neighboring properties.<\/p>\n 3.<\/strong>\tGet some insulation. Kyle keeps the heat really low and I\u2019m freezing my bum off. If you can swing it, I would also appreciate a new furnace and hot water heater. I\u2019ve been doing some research for you which I can pass along if you\u2019d like\u2026<\/p>\n 4.<\/strong>\tWatch less HGTV. Honestly, I\u2019m getting a complex by listening to the whiney people on TV talk about new homes with open floor plans, granite counters and remodeled bathrooms. Why aren\u2019t old houses ever good enough?<\/p>\n These seem simple enough, if you ask me. I consider these goals the least you can do given all that I do for you. So raise your dust rags and weeding implements, here\u2019s to a happy and successful 2012!<\/p>\n Warm regards, Dear Amy and Kyle, I hope you had enjoyable holidays. Based on the number of parties you attended and all of the comings and goings I saw and heard about, it seems that you were festive and merry. Good for you. Recently I\u2019ve been listening to you banter back and forth about potential New Year\u2019s resolutions for 2012. Lose some weight. Read more. Spend less time watching TV. You know, the kinds of things that<\/p>\n
\nYour House<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"